Simple Love
Isn't Love suppose to be simple?
A feeling between two persons.
Just loving each other?
I find that its getting harder as I grow older.
I really thought this time I got the right one. Then again, the truth is, I did not.
Getting involved at the beginning is already wrong. But he said they are seperated.
Getting more and more in love is the wrong move. Cause I find it harder to leave him.
I thought through the whole relationship again and again and again and again..
I prayed about it again and again and again and again..
I knew what I should do but I always listen to what he has to say and then its all back to square one again..
The agurments are the same. Again and again.
He will say things to spite me and I will say things to piss him off.. Again and again and again..
I am really exhausted..
I am such a lousy fighter..
Whatever I said has no creditibilty.
Whatever he promised seems to be empty.
"Start a family.." that is the most impossible of all.
How am I suppose to believe that?
He does not seems to know what he really wants.
But I never doubt that he really feels for me.
Neither do I ever believe that he feels NOTHING for her.
"You can't have the best of the both worlds.."
Sound so familiar.. Isn't that what I told him before?
What I want, I told him truthfully.
He knew that is what he cannot give to me, "for now.." he said.
Then when? Can I give a dateline?
Let's say, wait till the child is born. Will he be able to show me whatever he promised?
I doubt so. I can see, it will be another beginning of another story.
A story with no ending.
I have no more tears. I am really tired.
Tired of thinking of you.
Tired of thinking of them.
Tired of acting deaf when they called me names.
Tired of keeping things to myself.
Tired of thinking he will be mine soon.
Tired of having to pray for them.
Tired of being generous.
Really tired. Really.
I find it so hard to let go. Cause I know I feel for him dearly.
And I know this is not fair.
I know I should just let go.
Thank you for making it so easy this time.
My heart was all numb when he said those hurting words.
I cannot feel anything anymore.
I wish I can just have him in front of me, so I can just hug him tight and listen to his heartbeat once again.
And I know now, I will not have the chance to anymore.
"Think for yourself.." they all said. I tried. I really did.
Yeah, since he cannot give the happiness I want. I should.
I should have someone that I can proudly post all our lovely photos on Facebook.
With him, can I?
Typing this with tears obstructing isn't easy..
Time will heal all wounds, that's what they all said.
I am really really tired.
I have no strength to carry on this...
Really tired..
A feeling between two persons.
Just loving each other?
I find that its getting harder as I grow older.
I really thought this time I got the right one. Then again, the truth is, I did not.
Getting involved at the beginning is already wrong. But he said they are seperated.
Getting more and more in love is the wrong move. Cause I find it harder to leave him.
I thought through the whole relationship again and again and again and again..
I prayed about it again and again and again and again..
I knew what I should do but I always listen to what he has to say and then its all back to square one again..
The agurments are the same. Again and again.
He will say things to spite me and I will say things to piss him off.. Again and again and again..
I am really exhausted..
I am such a lousy fighter..
Whatever I said has no creditibilty.
Whatever he promised seems to be empty.
"Start a family.." that is the most impossible of all.
How am I suppose to believe that?
He does not seems to know what he really wants.
But I never doubt that he really feels for me.
Neither do I ever believe that he feels NOTHING for her.
"You can't have the best of the both worlds.."
Sound so familiar.. Isn't that what I told him before?
What I want, I told him truthfully.
He knew that is what he cannot give to me, "for now.." he said.
Then when? Can I give a dateline?
Let's say, wait till the child is born. Will he be able to show me whatever he promised?
I doubt so. I can see, it will be another beginning of another story.
A story with no ending.
I have no more tears. I am really tired.
Tired of thinking of you.
Tired of thinking of them.
Tired of acting deaf when they called me names.
Tired of keeping things to myself.
Tired of thinking he will be mine soon.
Tired of having to pray for them.
Tired of being generous.
Really tired. Really.
I find it so hard to let go. Cause I know I feel for him dearly.
And I know this is not fair.
I know I should just let go.
Thank you for making it so easy this time.
My heart was all numb when he said those hurting words.
I cannot feel anything anymore.
I wish I can just have him in front of me, so I can just hug him tight and listen to his heartbeat once again.
And I know now, I will not have the chance to anymore.
"Think for yourself.." they all said. I tried. I really did.
Yeah, since he cannot give the happiness I want. I should.
I should have someone that I can proudly post all our lovely photos on Facebook.
With him, can I?
Typing this with tears obstructing isn't easy..
Time will heal all wounds, that's what they all said.
I am really really tired.
I have no strength to carry on this...
Really tired..
posted by lovesweetpoison at 5:24 AM
3 Comments:
Because I believe that there is no right or wrong person, rules, conditions and situations when it comes to love, I've always let you go and love as you wish.
When I don't stop you, it doesn't mean that I don't love you. It just means that I know you too well to hold you back or put you down.
But please remember that you will always have me and the girls and no matter what happens, we will always love you for the friend and sister that you are.
Girl, remember you will always have those who REALLY & GENUINELY care for you around to give you all the support & love that you need.
Remember what I have told you before....be strong.
Hey babe! Porky is right! Be strong! And dun forget us! You know the numbers, sound the alarm bell. We are always here.
I say we need a gathering real soon, hor Porky? What say you? :)
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